Weird thing how I decided to write the post about motivation just today, when it happens so that I am drained of all will to work and think.
The past 7 days have been filled with events and activities of various types. Workdays were also filled with my full-time job and this weekend was filled with meeting friends back in my hometown. I have no idea how I managed to draw, write and post every day for the past 5 days, it defies all logic, knowing myself. I am lazy, I lack energy and motivation. Still, I manage to amaze myself from time to time… That is speaking of my personal projects, of course. I have plenty of motivation at work and I work and work until my eyes sting and my hand hurts and even then I take some 5 minute break on the balcony and come back to finish whatever I have started.
Needless to say this drains me. I drain me. This is bad and if you catch yourself doing it, better stop, because we only have this much motivation and will.
WHAT OPENED MY EYES
Some time ago I read one of Mark Manson’s articles, which I cannot find right now, although I spent an hour reading through everything he’s posted on his site. It would have been so much easier for me to just link it to you and let you read and understand it for yourselves and then post some drawings below, but now I’ll have to do the explaining. Mark’s article was about how we fail at the goals we set for ourselves, because we set them too high. And it’s not that we cannot achieve them because they are beyond our capabilities, it’s that they are beyond our will power to keep up with something that is different from what we are used to for too long. It’s a struggle every day to do this thing or things; you don’t see the result immediately, and there’s nothing to motivate you to go on. Eventually you quit. Or you see some results, you are content and decide to give it break. After all you are so tired of pushing yourself so often. The break stretches from one day to a week and eventually you quit.
New activities, new regimes, new duties and responsibilities stress us, and stress drains. Unclear goals, ever-stretching time periods or just unrealistically long time periods, drain us of willpower. You might push yourself so hard and tire yourself out so you end up tired for a whole month in advance (I am not talking about physical weariness, but emotional) . I’ve done this to myself many times for the past years.
What I learned from this is that diving straight into the deep with the “what doesn’t kill me makes me stronger” mindset, might really not kill you, but injure you emotionally for quite a while. In time you might actually start thinking you are incapable of achieving any goal you set yourself. So take small steps and don’t rush yourself. Set clear goals and terms, but most important of all: get to know yourself and your limits before setting any of the above.
With that said I’m going to pour myself a beer and take the rest of the night off, because I feel I have pushed myself too much for the past week and I don’t want to drain myself completely so early on on this challenge. I’ve done my fair share of drawing and studying at work today, but cannot share it with you due to terms of project confidentiality. So here’s a study I did while on one of my failed challenges from January this year: a study on some beautifully textured and lighted 3d model.
Good night! See you tomorrow!